Yesterday has been a sucky day for me.. Why do I say so? That's because I've just broke my friendship with a long time pal, Derrick...

It was supposed to be a good day despite coming back home from work in a "down-in-the-gutters" mood. The first thing that happened when I switched on my computer and log into my msn, one guy immediately spoke to me online.. Twas' Jagjit, and he was asking me about the money Derrick owed him for a long time...

Well I felt extremely annoyed about this because Jagjit has been asking me if Derrick did call me and pass me his money. I said "no" and he kept getting worried and shit. I was just trying to help him, he's been chasing for that money for almost a year. He's been asking me about the money for almost a year and naturally I'd get sick and tired of chasing after some money I don't owe. I'd even be willing to help Derrick clear up his debt just to keep that guy's mouth shut, to leave me in peace..

That's when I make a decision and tell Derrick everything one shot: Pay off the money and go, I am tired of chasing after some money I don't owe. I just told him something like that and he was like: Go away, don't lecture me...

Now this is when stuff became real serious, I was angry at the fact that he STILL thinks he's much more superior than me (fact: he's not) and that I am his pet dog. If he quit church I have to follow him or else he'd go became and pissed and shit. So pissed and shit he goes, going around telling everyone "there's no God" and crying over "why can't the Christians be nicer to me? I've done so much for them" or "why is it that people are so blind to acknowledge that there's no God"..

Naturally, I should be the one getting extremely angry. I've managed to get my "rage meter" far longer than I thought I'd last. He brought me to church, tell me to make a lot of friends there, and then left me there for good. When I grew closer to my church friends, he told me to leave. Now he's pointing every single bad thing about our church and claiming that he's "thinking-out-of-the-box"...

Back to the owing money business, so he wanted me to understand that he has "difficulties" (Which I doubt completely), saying he has hard times, his parent no money, he need to pay everything on his own: haircut, school fees, necessities (Complete bullshit). I'd believe him if he said all these with out telling my friend and I to go buffet together. Got money to eat buffet? Got enough money to go clubbing, to buy wax, to raise a pet dog, to own two flats, still can get pocket money from his grandparents, But no money to pay off a simple debt? I may be patient but I've got my own limits, I am not stupid and I am not even his pet dog.

So I told him if he don't want to return his debt is fine, just tell Jagjit, I am sick and tired of coming back from work listening to how Jagjit needs his money back. So he ended up calling me a dick and said "I can't control my frustrations" and therefore we cannot be friends.

Well good riddance I say, some part of me doesn't want him to leave but since he insist, I'd let him go and do whatever he likes (Get AIDS, have sex with random people, get a tattoo, join gang, I don't care anymore, it's none of my business already, he asked for it). I thought: "no point threading on an unstable friendship and pinning all my hopes anyway"..

I thought we could still be friends even if our belief system is different. That he would stay within his boundary and not hurt me at all, to think we'd stay out of talking about each other's belief. Well I was naive enough to expect all this from a jerk who no longer see what's right and wrong anymore and hellbent on pulling all my church mates down with him..

Joke of the day: He ended his last message saying he'd delete me from his MSN (Hey that's awesome, no more shitty "Hurrr God is not real look at the bible it's contradicting LOL" and also state that "to think i actually organized a buffet out of goodwill". If he has any goodwill left in him just return the damn money he owe then...

Since he don't want to be my friend then fine, it would have been better if he didn't backslide. He would have been a better friend, a better person. I am going to miss all the good memories. Bad time to be reminiscing.. My leader was right when he said I shouldn't be mixing with him since he has turned into someone I don't recognize anymore...