Back in my workplace, whenever I am bored, I always start to reflect on whatever events that occurred to me. Job in there is easy and repetitive anyway, so I can dwell into some deep thoughts.

Sometimes I wonder: do I really have so much friends back in Secondary school? From the way some treated me, I don't think they are pretty much qualified to be called friends at all. Take for instance, I could call Newel and his clique my "friends", but we don't really talk much at all, the only thing we've ever talked about is "backstabbing Sherman". Of course, that's when I just play along with it and just say "ya, ya" to it but didn't actually mean it (well, most of them at least).. I did that to the point when Sherman knew about this, he avoided me and let me join the clique. I joined the clique and I have absolutely nothing to talk about because no one even bothered about me there.

Another example is Wei Kien's clique (From my school), yeah they could come up with the best jokes ever and even become a clown of the class themselves. However, everyone of them always gang up on me and mock my religion. I have to tolerate it by playing "Mr.Nice Guy" with them just to get close with them. In the end? It obviously failed, Wei Kien is hellbent on mocking my religion so as the other clowns.

The people I truly consider as my Secondary school friends are actually just a few individuals who nobody actually cares about: Kelvin, Sherman, Yew Liang, Chee Chai and Chong Hui. However the irony is this: While I still maintain contact with Kelvin, Sherman and at least try to contact Chong Hui, I never did talk to the other 2 much even in school.

To the people whom I've mentioned: Before you have any smart comments to make, I want to state my purpose of this post. It is to make you think, whether I should still treat you any better for all the burdens you've laid upon me. While I've tried everything to come closer to all of you, to the expense that I even had to sell off one of my friendship once, when I am in trouble (as in suffering from bitterness after all the crap I've endured, not helping out with maths homework and stuff), when did anyone other than who I truly considered friends come to my rescue? I don't even remember any event like that. I spent my time being pushed around by a bunch of people who think it is funny to bully the "different one" and all of you just watch me grief.